I help people make funeral decisions ahead of time, so their families aren’t making them while they are grieving, stressed, and under pressure to make decisions quickly.
I explain the options in plain language, help put wishes in writing, and go through costs at whatever pace feels comfortable. These discussions can be made in one’s home, here at the funeral home, or by phone or email. My goal is to make you feel comfortable.
If you’ve never met someone who does this, that’s normal. Most people don’t spend time in funeral service until they have to. Here’s what my job looks like, what it doesn’t include, and what to ask anyone you consider working with.
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Ask the Specialist: What does a funeral planning specialist do?
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What I do
I listen first. A good first meeting is mostly questions. What matters to you? What would be hardest for your family? What do you want people to remember? My philosophy is simple: the most meaningful goodbyes are the ones that feel unmistakably like the person being remembered.
I explain your options plainly. Burial, cremation, green choices and different styles of service. There are no wrong answers, only choices that fit you or don’t. NFDA’s 2025 research found that 61.4% of consumers are interested in exploring green funeral options and 58.3% have attended a funeral at a non-traditional location. People increasingly want a send-off that’s their own.
I make room for your traditions. Every family approaches death, remembrance and ritual differently. I’ve worked with families on Jewish, Hindu, Buddhist and Christian funeral traditions, as well as green and natural burial planning, and I take the time to learn what matters to each person.
I go through the price list with you. The FTC’s Funeral Rule entitles you to a written price list and to choose only what you want. We can read it line by line, with no deadline looming.
I help you write it down. The FTC recommends putting your preferences in writing and sharing copies with family and your attorney. I help turn your ideas into one clear plan.
I explain your payment options. Paying in advance is a choice, but it’s one worth understanding. It locks in the price of what’s in your contract and turns your plan into a signed agreement. I’ll walk you through how that works in Indiana, where, per the Indiana Funeral Directors Association, you have 30 days to change your mind before the contract is locked in or irrevocable. This is for your protection. The money is transferable if you move out of state.
I help you talk with your family. Most of us put this off. In NFDA’s 2017 study, 62.5% said it’s very important to share funeral wishes with family, yet only 21.4% had. I can help you plan that conversation or help facilitate the conversation. Again, my goal is to help ease the stress of these conversations.
I help you keep the plan current. Life changes. The FTC suggests revisiting your decisions every few years.
What I'm not
I help you decide and document. Caring for a person who has died and directing the service belong to licensed funeral directors, whom NFDA describes as licensed professionals who manage the legal, practical and personal sides of a funeral. In Indiana, the State Board of Funeral and Cemetery Service oversees funeral homes, funeral directors and prepaid funeral sales.
Why a real person still matters
Online tools are handy, and plenty of people start there. But in NFDA’s 2025 study, nearly 48% of those who planned a funeral online still needed a funeral director’s help, and more than 15% found the process impersonal. A question like “What would Mom have wanted?” doesn’t fit neatly in a dropdown menu.
Questions to ask any funeral planner
Who do you work for, and which funeral home will carry out my plan?
May I see your price list? You’re entitled to it.
Is there a charge to meet? At Aaron-Ruben-Nelson, my first meeting is free.
Do I have to prepay? It’s your choice. A good planner will explain the benefits without pressure.
Where does my money go, and can I cancel or transfer? In Indiana, you can cancel within 30 days, and after that the contract can be transferred.
What happens if I move? The FTC notes that transfers can cost extra.
A good planner welcomes every one of these. If someone hurries you past them, take note.
About me
I’m an Advanced Funeral Planning Specialist, also called a Pre-need Advisor, at Aaron-Ruben-Nelson Mortuary, where I help individuals and families make thoughtful, personal decisions about how they want to be remembered. I’m a Carmel native, a graduate of Carmel High School and the University of Colorado Boulder, and I’ve spent years serving this community on boards, commissions and volunteer groups. I’m married to Aaron-Ruben-Nelson President Jennifer Nelson Williams, and I’m the proud father of Holden. Joining Aaron-Ruben-Nelson is another way I get to keep serving, by helping families plan with compassion, creativity and intention.
Ready to talk it through? Book a conversation with me. I serve Zionsville, Carmel, Noblesville, Westfield, Fishers and the Greater Indianapolis area. Aaron-Ruben-Nelson Mortuary is at 11411 N Michigan Rd, Zionsville, IN 46077.
Prefer to start on your own? Visit the Plan Ahead page or print the Pre-Planning Checklist.
Frequently asked questions
Is a funeral planning specialist the same as a funeral director? No. A funeral director is a licensed professional who cares for the person who has died and directs the funeral. I help you decide and document your choices ahead of time.
Does it cost anything to meet with you? No. The first meeting is free, with no obligation.
Do I have to buy a prepaid plan? No. You can record your wishes without paying anything. Many people do choose to prepay, because it locks in the price of the goods and services in their contract and secures their plan in writing with the funeral home.
Sources
- Federal Trade Commission, The FTC Funeral Rule
- Federal Trade Commission, Planning Your Own Funeral
- NFDA, Media Center statistics and “What is a Funeral Director?”
- NFDA, 2025 Consumer Awareness and Preferences Study, as reported by Connecting Directors
- NFDA, 2017 Consumer Awareness and Preferences Study, as reported by Connecting Directors
- Indiana Funeral Directors Association, Funeral Planning
- Indiana Professional Licensing Agency, State Board of Funeral and Cemetery Service
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